What is a mediator and how does mediation work in the Netherlands? 

Mediation offers an alternative to going to court. It’s a way to resolve conflicts through guided conversation – with the help of a neutral third person called a mediator. Unlike a judge or a lawyer, a mediator doesn’t make decisions. Instead, they help all parties involved work towards a shared solution. 

In this article, we explain what mediation is, when it’s recommended, how mediators work, and how to verify if someone is a certified mediator in the Netherlands. 

What is mediation? 

Mediation is a voluntary process where people in conflict try to resolve their issues with the help of a trained mediator. Finding common ground without taking legal action is what mediation is designed to achieve.

The role of the mediator is to: 

• create a safe environment for open communication 

• guide the conversation 

• ensure that both sides are heard 

• support the process without taking sides 

 

The key principles of mediation 

• Voluntariness – You choose to participate and can stop at any time. 

• Confidentiality – What’s said in mediation stays private, unless everyone agrees otherwise. 

• Neutrality – The mediator doesn’t take part in the conflict or push any outcomes. 

• Impartiality – The mediator treats everyone equally and fairly. 

 

When is mediation a good idea? 

Mediation is suitable for many types of conflict – from family issues and divorce to work disputes, neighbour problems, and even disagreements with the municipality. 

It is especially helpful when: 

• You want a quick, less expensive solution 

• You need to keep a working or family relationship intact 

• Both parties want control over the outcome 

• You are willing to talk and work together 

• There are communication issues but still hope for agreement 

• A legal judgment wouldn’t solve the full problem 

When is mediation not recommended? 

Mediation may not be the right option if: 

• You feel unsafe meeting the other party 

• There is a clear imbalance of power 

• One side refuses to cooperate 

• The situation requires legal protection or formal judgment 

If mediation is not possible, it’s wise to contact a lawyer. This is not an aggressive move – it simply means having someone on your side who knows your rights and can try to negotiate a solution. Going to court should always be the last resort. 

Can I check if someone is a real mediator? 

Unlike the title of “lawyer,” “mediator” is not protected by law. This means anyone can call themselves a mediator – but not all mediators are equally qualified. 

There are two respected certifications: 

• MfN – The Mediator Federatie Nederland is the leading Dutch organisation. MfN mediators follow strict training and ethical standards. 

• ADR – Stands for Alternative Dispute Resolution and refers to an international register of professional mediators. 

At Counselr, we only work with MfN-registered mediators. You can check if someone is officially listed by searching their name on the MfN website under “Zoek op Naam”. 

Why does Counselr only list MfN-registered mediators? 

MfN mediators meet high professional standards. They are trained, follow a strict code of conduct, and are subject to ongoing education and disciplinary rules. 

In addition, only MfN mediators can handle legal aid cases – meaning they can offer services at reduced costs to clients who qualify for financial support. 

How does the mediation process work? 

Before the actual mediation starts, parties receive several official documents: 

• The Mediation Agreement – the contract that all parties and the mediator sign 

• The MfN Mediation Rules – setting out how the mediation will proceed 

• The MfN Code of Conduct – outlining the mediator’s professional duties 

• The Complaints Procedure – explaining how to report misconduct 

The Mediation Agreement is the most important document. It confirms the basic principles of mediation, outlines the fees, and sets the ground rules. The mediator will go through this with everyone and answer any questions before the agreement is signed. 

Because of these documents, the start of mediation can feel formal – but this structure helps build trust and clarity. 

Do I need more than one mediator? 

Usually, one mediator is enough. However, in complex or multi-party cases, an additional mediator may be suggested. If this happens, the first mediator will usually coordinate the process and explain why extra support is needed. 

Conclusion 

Mediation is a flexible, confidential, and often faster way to resolve conflicts without going to court. A skilled mediator helps you communicate, understand each other better, and move towards a shared solution. While anyone can claim to be a mediator, choosing an MfN-registered mediator ensures that you’re working with a trained, accountable professional. Whether you’re divorcing, managing a workplace issue, or involved in a dispute with the municipality – mediation could be a powerful first step. 

 

Disclaimer: The information provided on this website is for general informational purposes only and is not legally binding. Although we strive for accuracy, the content may contain errors. If you notice any mistakes, please let us know by contacting us via the contact form located at the bottom of the page.

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